Monday, February 21, 2011


This is a blog entry from someone else's site that I wanted to share with you. If you would like the link to it click here. I guess I thought it was appropriate tonight to talk blog about loneliness because I feel all of us feel it at times. I am grateful to say as I work my program and as I have learned to stay connected with others, loneliness is not something I feel much anymore. Although when I was in my marriage, in my addiction and in my isolation, it was previlent in my everyday life. Some people would argue the fact that you can't feel lonely when you are married and I would beg to differ. For me almost from the very get go of our marriage, I went into isolation from just about everything and everyone that had meant something to me in my life. No wonder I packed the weight on even more. I believe I was just eating away all those feelings of guilt, shame, loneliness, and anger really. I actually found a video of me at my heaviest weight in my bathing suit that I took the night before I was going to start weight watchers. I will see if I can pull it off my tape and YouTube it. I was living it and I can't believe what I see.

Even though my husband at the time encouraged me to get out and spend time with friends. I didn't want to. There were a lot of reasons but I would say one of them is because I was ashamed at who I had become. I was in a lot of denial about my weight. It just kept creeping up the longer I was married. I wasn't sure what was going on at the time but now looking back I was eating my emotions and it was causing me to get bigger and bigger til I didn't recognize the girl in the mirror. Funny thing now is I am on the opposite spectrum and am  having to learn who I am now in this body I have today.

So.. I wanted to include this blog on loneliness because I believe it's a huge part of dealing with body image issues as well as weight problems. I loved how this is written and hope you enjoy. .......

Sometimes loneliness makes the loudest noise we hear. Yet often it’s a loneliness of our own making, almost like heart disease, diabetes and stroke which are largely self-inflicted diseases.

We long to be accepted, loved, cared for and held. We curse our timidity and other complexes that fence us in and keep us from touching others. We often feel like we are in a crowd, and no one understands our language.

We over-spend on beauty aids and stylish clothes. We desperately diet. We feverishly work out. We enroll in seminars and groups, hoping to remake our personalities. The intense self-absorption often results in a sleekly engineered person – much like our sleekly engineered foods – high on appearance, but empty of important values.

When we feel depressed, when our children rebel, when our jobs are threatened, when friends we’re losing our homes, we need friends who care. Without friends, it’s a short road to despair.

We also need friends as we struggle with bad habits and endeavor to change to a more wholesome lifestyle, and various others through various support groups, learning together how to live without their crutches. Persons who are changing their taste buds as well as their habits also need the understanding and encouragement of supportive people.

Reach out. Include stressed co-worker, or your distressed neighbor in your circle of friendship where comforting happens, and where affirmation flourishes.

How about your physician? your nurse? your priest or pastor? They, too, grieve and hurt, even as they heal other.

That’s how God works, through people touching other people, through friends reaching out to friends. Become a partner with God: busy yourself on His errands. As you minister to the needy and alienated around you, your own despair will begin to melt. Likewise, your own loneliness will begin to melt, and in its place, echoing joy will fill your void with peace and serenity.

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