I released 130 lbs but seriously I have LOST MY MIND!!

YES... Its true! My program that I was offering at $497 is now $11.00. So some may say.. "What the heck?" Well, in the last 24 hours I have received a lot of emails from people who want so badly to do my program.. that honestly need what I have but couldn't afford it so ... God said to offer it to people at the $11.00 price.... so since I am getting really good at following directions even though it sometimes doesn't make sense.. I trust Him. I just want to help the most people I possibly can so take advantage of this. This is a no brainer. If you know of anyone.. I mean ANYONE.. who has struggled with weight issues, self esteem, stress or even total out of balance life, send them my website www.30DaysToLife.com and have them sign up. I say .. give me 30 days and I will give you a whole new life. So if you think you are ready, make sure to sign up and then please pass the word to your friends and family. You are welcome to email me if you have any questions.

I look forward to working with all you faithful followers of mine. This is more fun than I ought to be allowed to have. See you Friday!

"Trust in thyself and in others"

Isn't it so true that TRUST is something a lot of us struggle with? How often do you find yourself second guessing yourself, struggling with knowing whether or not to trust someone close to you or even trusting that gut feeling deep inside your heart? I know for me I have had to have several experiences that have helped me to learn what that voice inside of me is saying and then trusting it in order to make important decisions. It's just like anything... it takes time to develop that muscle.

As I sit here in my PJs on my porch swing and listening to celtic music, I can't help but reflect back on the many opportunities that I have had over the last couple of years where I had to learn to listen and then trust that inner voice, I call God's Spirit to help guide me.

There was a time in my life that I felt so distant from God although I was going through the motions. At times, I thought I was somehow different than others as I heard them tell stories of how powerfully connected they were to God's direction. I felt, somehow left out, not worthy or just not connected. I wanted to know that God was there and that I knew what he desired for me but it was more of a void than anything. Not knowing exactly how to find that true connection, I figured I would just live life the way I had for so long until one day I started the journey of recovery from my food addiction. EVERYTHING began to change almost over night.

It was so interesting to me that almost immediately after I got off of sugar and flour and started working the  12 step program, I felt an AMAZING connection with God. It seemed almost like the food that I was eating and putting into my body was directly affecting that connection. Suddenly this clarity of mind came and life just seemed easier. I have heard time and time again people in our program experience the exact same thing. Is it possible that for the last 30 some odd years, I had been the one that was, with my choices in what I was eating, keep me from the very source that I needed most in my life?

Trusting others... what is there to say about that? Well, people will be people and haven't we all been let down from time to time? I know the more I trust myself, the more I can trust others. Trust is a funny thing. In my opinion it's something that needs to be earned. Earned in the sense that as I experience someone I look for attributes of trust in them. I keep really aware of how I feel when I am around them. I ask myself the question often are they adding to my well being or are they constantly sucking energy from me. You know what I mean .. Leaches.. or lilies. Well, as I have learned to trust my gut it usually is right... and if it's not or I choose to go against it, I find there has always been a lesson for me to learn from it. Not good or bad.. just is!

"ACT NOW Scholarship"

For those of you that are really wanting to work with me but are having a difficult time paying the full tuition. I am offering an "ACT NOW" Scholarship. Click here and you will be directed to my website to fill out your contact information where you can explain your needs. I want to help! Let me know how I can best serve you. Only a few more days til my program starts. www.30DaysToLife.com.

"Connecting with People ..is it Important?"

From a very young age I have always been intrigued with getting to know people. I remember as a little girl sitting out on my front door step asking the guy we hired to paint our garage door a bunch of questions. I wanted to know what got him into painting and if he liked it and what would he do if he didn't paint. I don't know where this desire to connect with people came from other than I just thought people were fascinating. I also remember being a teenager sitting in the dentist office striking up a conversation with someone in the waiting room. Within 5 minutes I knew just about everything about them and afterwards my mother asking me .."How do you do that?"

I want to FEEL someone's soul and I do that by communicating on a deep level. I want to know what makes them passionate. I want to know the "WHY" they are passionate. There is nothing more fullfilling for me than to see someone living their truth and for me to be part of the journey is helping them discover that true passion. I can always tell when they have hit that place where they are doing what they love when I ask them the question.. "If you had all the money in the world and didn't have to worry about any of that.. what would you do?"

True connection with people isn't hard.. it just takes being willing to open yourself to them. People only open up when you create the safe space for them to do so. I have sat down and met with hundreds of people over the past 8 months and I can say each and everyone of those people I connected with because I was intentional about wanting to know them. People love to talk about themselves. They love when people show interest in them and what they are up to. It's not just a networking process but for me has to come from the heart.

As I watched a video we did of my father 2 weeks before he passed away, it just reinforced how important it is to really genuinely care for another human being. My father was a master at this. I swear everyone felt like they were his best friend. I know growing up watching how he did this made an impact on me.

So .. I ask the question, what keeps up from connecting with others sometimes? Well if I was to guess, I would have to say that it might have something to do with not wanting to be vulnerable with people. I am finding this especially among single's. As I am venturing back into the dating world, I am seeing a lot of fear around this topic. I can see there is a lot of history with people but I believe the more confident you are in who you are the more transparent you can be in these types of relationships. For me I have had to dig deep and make sure that I really know me and what I want in order to give myself to someone in a deeper way. I have had to learn to trust myself. That didn't come over night and still takes work but I will say this go around in dating its much different and much more meaningful for me. I am healthier in mind, body and soul and it makes all the difference in the world.

Overall, all of us want to be wanted and want to know that we are important to another human being. It starts with us. We are the ones that need to allow safe spaces for people to connect with us and then be willing to care enough about the other person to show them respect in getting to know them. Connecting authentically and in a healthy way just like anything.. takes work AND is very rewarding from what I have experienced.

"Happy Father's Day.. DAD!" I miss you!

Sorry for the very very long pause at the beginning of this. I couldn't edit it out in time to get it posted. 


15 years ago today was the last time I talked to my dad on the phone. At the time I was serving a full time mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in Idaho Falls, Idaho. It was only a short couple months after then that I received a call a week before I was to fly home that my father had passed away in a sudden car accident. I remember immediately feeling a sense of relief as I know life hadn't been easy for my father in many ways. Although he was only 60 at the time, which is soo young, I also felt as though it was his time to go. I can't hardly believe it's been almost 15 years.

Some of the most important things he taught me were ..

• Don't let anyone else determine your value.. you are perfect just the way you are
• Figure out what it is that you love and make money doing it
• When you get bucked off, get right back on and keep going
• People and relationships are important
• Make everyone you meet feel like they are the most important person in your life
• Seek for truth in all things
• It doesn't matter where someone has come from.. love them all the same
• Never to give up on myself ... even when you think others have

My father was one that influenced so many people in this world. He started a summer camp for kids for the sole purpose of making a difference in the world. He had the vision of making the world a better place by teaching correct principle to the youth who would be our future generation. He had the biggest heart in the world. We used to joke with him a lot about his HUGE rib cage. He needed a huge rib cage to hold that huge heart of his. I remember at his funeral people coming up to me and telling me that they had lost their best friend. Of course, I was thinking.. "NO. he's my best friend!" That is how my father was. He made people feel so special. He took time to develop those relationships. Many people trusted him with his life. Still to this day, I hear stories of how much my father meant to them in their lives. He was someone who cared very very deeply for those around him and people could feel it to the very core of their souls. 

I know for a fact as I was struggling through my teenage years, I wouldn't have made it had it not been for the encouragement I got from my dad. I knew he was always there for me. I always knew he believed in me. One of the last things he told my grandmother before he died was that he worried least about me. He knew I was going to be ok. I can't say my father was perfect.. actually he was far from perfect however at the same time he did the very best he knew at the time and I am grateful for the influence he was in my life and still is. I know for a fact he is with me in many ways as I go through this process of healing and of creation. I feel his presents near me often. 

What a beautiful example he was of being a true blue dreamer. I got my passion from him and my drive to never quit. He lead his life from his heart. He believed in people. He was a thinker.. a very deep one at that and wanted more than anything to live in nature which is where he found his soul rejuvenated. I know for a fact that so much of who I have become is because of him. 

So today with it being father's day I want to share with the world, my appreciation for who he was and what role he still plays in my life today. Dad.. thank you for your example, your tenacity, your love and your acceptance of me at all different stages. I love you.. I miss you.. I think of you.... and I acknowledge your presents still in my life. 

"Triggers.....What are they?"

I have to say today has been a day of triggers for me. Not good or bad.. just is. So what is a trigger? Many times I say that word, people kind of look at me strange. The best way I have to explain what a trigger is if one minute you are feeling totally fine and at peace and then something someone says or does, triggers a strong emotion within you that doesn't feel so good. Ever had that happen to you? Well it happened to me 2 separate times to me today.

So why do we get triggered? Well, for me it usually means there is something for me to learn more about myself. Triggers have very very little to do with that other person. Many times we want to blame our triggers on others because that keeps us in a place of being a victim. To me triggers are there to teach me.. even when they are painful at times and I don't know in the  moment what they mean.

So today as I got triggered as someone was talking in church, I realized afterwards it was because what was being said sounded just like me many years ago when I wasn't in a good place in my life. Not to say that the person is where I was.. she just brought all those feelings back to me. Again not good or bad.. just is. It's all just information the feelings it stirred in me.

After I had time to reflect, make a phone call and turn to God to seek for answers to the "why," I realized  why I do what I do and why I am so passionate about it. I spend time blogging, coaching people, sharing my story with others, all because I hate to see people continue down the road of self hatred. It's everywhere. With men.. with women. I KNOW what it feels like to be in a place where I have felt like a failure and that I couldn't do anything right and that no one would ever want me. I know what it feels like to wish I could end of my life so I didn't have to worry about fitting in or doing the wrong thing. I know what it feels like to feel true rejection. I know what it feels like to not see one ounce of hope in my life regarding my weight, my worth, my relationships etc. I know and have been to the darkest of dark for me when I wanted to end my life thinking it was going to solve it all. I know what it feels like to live in such SHAME that I never thought I couldn't have it any other way.

I also have experienced the greatest amount of JOY possible for me to this point in my life. Once I experienced this abundant JOY and PEACE in my life.. there is no turning back. I now know what it feels like and when I don't feel it, I am unsettled and do everything I can to get it back. So when I got triggered today, instead of freaking out and going into the food or some other unhealthy behavior, I turned to God and to others who could help me get through it to seek for answers. It's time for me to go in and then up to God for understanding. If you think about it, God is the ultimate source of answers. So what did I learn from my triggers today...

• I learned that it's important to accept others for exactly where their at.
• I learned that if God wants me to be in service in sharing my story... he will provide the way, I don't have to force that onto anyone.
• I learned that when I get triggered to not react but instead not engage in conversation til I have had time to sit with what I am to learn.
• I learned that first and foremost I need to take care of myself
• I learned that other's problems are not mine to fix unless God provides the EASY path to do so
• I learned that God loves me 
• I learned that I am not perfect however it's ok I am perfectly where I am
• I learned to always be open and share what is in my heart as long as I am straight in my intentions
• I learned even more how important it is to connect authentically with others. 
• I learned people who I am triggered by are there to teach me something about me.. NOT THEM.

So much of life is about trial and error. I love that I get to on a daily basis discover more and more about me. I get to go deeper in my recovery.. deeper in my healing.. deeper in my connection with God. He truly is my partner and the more I include him in EVERYTHING.. the more I see His magical hand in ALL THINGS. 

"Finding PEACE with Self and Others"

When people ask me what success means to me, I don't hesitate at all in answering feeling "PEACE!" I can't stress enough how much that has meant to me in my life. I think of how much of my life I lived being at war with who I was and what I thought of myself. I honestly can't think of a time that I have felt this much peace ever. It seems sometimes so ordinary that people say they want peace but what does that really mean?

We say we want peace but what are we doing on a daily basis to find it.

For me peace is a feeling of completeness, wholeness, serenity, balanced, content, love, acceptance and being centered. Even in this moment as I sit on my bed, listening to my pandora, meditative music with my candles on, with my window open and the wind blowing through the trees, I am in gratitude for the solitude I feel in the deepest part of my soul. Sometimes I wonder if life gets any better than this.

I cherish these moments because I know they are a gift from God. So much of my life was lived with one drama after another from the people I chose to surround myself with or the negative chatter in my head. As I learned to quiet my mind, my thoughts and my emotions, I began to find this place in my soul that was at rest. It's like with anything, I had to work at learning how to get here.

If you find yourself always on edge, always trying to control things and never feeling settled, I challenge you to take some time looking at why you don't allow your soul to breathe. SLOW DOWN... take time for you. Peace doesn't come when you are at war. Where are you at war in your life? Make a list... look at it. What can you do to start eliminating negativity? Are there people you need to set boundaries around? Are there some people you need to stop hanging out with? Let me tell you, I am now so sensitive to those people around me that are in that negative energy that it's tangible when they are with me. I don't listen to their stories for too long until I excuse myself. I am not to say I don't spend time with people who are struggling in life but if you are in a place you are not willing to humbly look at things and make changes, there is nothing I can do to help. On the other hand, I thrive and enjoy very much those people who are really ready to take it on and who are truly searching for that peace. They are the ones who I delight in helping along the journey to finding peace and they are usually the ones that find it. They inspire me as I watch them shift and find healing to what they have experienced in their lives.

The beautiful thing about all this is that I have learned that regardless of where anyone is at .. at any given time in their life, I have no judgement.. it's just where they are at however when it comes to my own personal boundaries, it's important that I surround myself with positivity and healthiness because ultimately it does affect my own peace. Again.. this is just what is true for me. You will need to find out what is true for you.

I want to let you know that I think of each of you multiple times a day as I am developing my programs. Hoping that I tap into what it is that you need most. I believe God allows me to go through my own journey and experiences so that I may share with you how I find peace in my own life. I first had to find peace with who I am .. what I stand for and the gift that I am to the world... afterwards I am learning how important it is to make peace with my surroundings.